Let Go of the Wheel | Week 25 Weight Loss

Day 176, 123 pounds lost.

Yesterday when I woke up I felt like shit. I didn’t want to go to boot camp at all.  I was so exhausted, but that little voice in the back of my head kept saying “move your butt.” I muttered and moaned all the way down to Lakeville. Do you ever do that? Spit out obscenities when you drive? I do. When I arrived at the gym, I noticed there was only one car; mine.  I must have had the strangest look on my face because it felt like an episode of the Twilight Zone. In my head, I was thinking….”Was I the only one that came to class today? How is that possible?” I walked slowly to the door looking around the parking lot utterly confused…….. *left eyebrow raised*. Long story short, everyone was down on the lake about a mile away doing a beach WOD. I must not have gotten the memo. *shrug*.  Down to the lake I went, moaning again. !@!@!@!@!@  Now I was pissed because I was late.

I wore the wrong shoes as usual, but something amazing came out of yesterday that made me realize I’m not the one in control. My right leg six months ago wouldn’t move, and every step was labored and painful. Additionally, about ten days ago I was told that I would never be able to run or even jog on that leg. “It was as good as it was ever going to be.”  There’s a pocket right above the knee that is swollen from years of inflammation – it looks like a little bulge. I’ve been working with an amazing chiropractor that gave me hope for the first time in six years that I might regain some mobility. Although I was slow and I could only handle a couple sprints, that darn let me jog on it yesterday. Furthermore, it doesn’t hurt today at all. I had to beat it a couple times to pop it back in place, but it’s doing fine. Cheers to the pessimists that told me it wouldn’t happen. I’m going to keep working on it, and I WILL be able to jog on it. I’m not saying its comfortable, I’m saying its possible. We can take guidance from medical professionals all day long but I assure you the final say isn’t ours. 

The workout was over. There I was behind the wheel soaking wet after I jumped in the lake with all my clothes on but I felt amazing. There was a reason I was supposed to go. I laughed all the way home when I realized that things are happening right in front of me every day. They don’t always happen in ways we want or expect, but nonetheless, they appear. During a few days when my faith had been tested, God showed me something amazing. He’s driving my car right now, and I was told to take my hands off the wheel and trust. So… damn, I’m just going to let him drive.

Lovingly,

Bean